O my soul, put your hope in God
My help, my Rock, I will praise Him
Sing, oh, sing through the raging storm
You're still my God, my salvation!
Lord there are things I've prayed
Not come true
So my tongue, I've stayed
Said and thought it's in your hands
but underneath my heart is mad
Wanting wanting all my life
my family complete, restored, made right
the biggest torn inside my heart
is not the one at my side
but the one that long ago that Scottish night
ripped open my world
and plunged into night
my parents fighting
became something
else
and so I blocked it out
shrugged it off
but when it comes, it comes in waves
the grief unchecked
the pain is there
beneath the present, there is scar
history and apologies
not acknowledge, not returned
sorry, we missed
a life of loving each other it seems
God now I come to you
I know you see all my sin
everything I've contributed
all I said and all I say
The tongue that cannot be tamed
by my strength
but you are powerful still over my unbridled way
I will lay myself down at your feet
heal me heal me O my saviour
I cannot fix things
my doctor thank you for his gift
wise counsel may I not forget
what can you do you cannot change them
you cannot control them
I surrender Father, their salvation is in your hand
Forgive me for anger
here in my heart I have killed my own blood
as your people did for they thought
they knew the way the story should end
but you hold the pen and you write the way
I cannot see the narrative until I see your face
Give me a quiet spirit
loving
patient humble too
an honest heart
a gentle spirit
a broken heart broken still
that I may minister, speak truth, out of the depts
knowing your will being done
is the greatest way.
how do I know this? he says I'm brainwashed
Lord but I know you
I trust you
You are who you are
A good and faithful Father
you bring your children out of slavery
Out of barrenness
Into a land of plenty and of peace
We know the way you do this speaks again to who you are
a slain lamb
sacrificing your life for ours
In every story of substitutionary atonement
hearts are pulled and tears fall
amazing love! how can it be!
may my heart be after yours
a servant heart
a sacrificial heart
a resolutely faithful to the Father's will heart
a faithful heart
a compassionate heart
a patient heart
a long-suffering heart
a generous heart
a trusting in God heart
a feeling heart
a loving heart
Father you began a good work in me
and will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ
and I can trust you, and fall into your hands
You will take care of me
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