Grandma's House

It’s raining.

Will this always be grandma’s house?

No it won’t.

Just like the seasons, the seasons come and go

The flowers, plants,

they

come and go.

They wither, they die, new buds spring forth.

Can’t hold on to this house, or to

Grandma to come back to this house.

She’s in a better house, she’s in God’s house,

she’s in the Father’s house.

When the Lord comes back he will call us all together;

the dead in Christ will rise first

and we will all meet him in the air

so we will all be with the Lord forever

and we will all be in the Father’s house worshiping together

forever and ever.

We won’t need this house,

Grandma’s house

Because there was sorrow that came along with the joy as well

It was so often a sanctuary but it also really wasn’t.

It could never keep out

it could never truly keep out

all the problems, everything outside

It wasn’t a solution, it was a gift

and now it’s been taken back

to the giver of all gifts.

LORD thank you for Grandma,

thank you for giving her to us

thank you that we were so blessed;

she was a grandma we could always go to for hugs and hot water bottles and just nice things just love and guidance and funny things as well

thank you that she shared her life with us

and she cared for us

Though walking into every room, it feels like

She might still be here

Where is she?

Why is she not sitting in her armchair?

Why

She’s not here.

Mary, Mary

Why are you crying?

He is not here, he is risen.

He is risen!

Lord you have not left us orphans,

And because you live we will live also.

And beause you live grandma will live also

And we will see her again.

Thank you

That you don’t leave us orphans

You leave us with your word

That the Holy Spirit helped the apostles to write

and now the Holy Spirit helps us to see and understand

and to know you

But the spirit blows where it wills and we don’t see it,

We don’t know where it goes…

I pray that you will blow the spirit into this family

We need you

We need you

And I know there’s so much work to be done,

your work LORD;

Please keep me faithful to speaking your truth in love into C's life, R's life

What am I doing here crying?

Why am I wasting time for crying over people whose eternal salvation is secured?

So many still don’t know you.

And they’ll never see grandma again unless they do

LORD I pray that you will help me fix my eyes on the kingdom.

On the comfort and the joy of the kingdom

But also of the work of the kingdom.

I pray that you’ll help me put my faith in you – that you are working in this world still, you haven’t left us

You haven’t just left us to fall apart.

That even in all the problems and all the pain you are calling your people to yourself LORD.

And I pray that I would learn LORD, to be bolder to say the words even to people like  who I feel  will think I’m crazy and yeah will bar me from  or something but LORD,   needs to hear you too,  ’s part of our family too and we love  . Help me to love   more.

Thank you LORD for showing me to move forward

Standing on the shoulders of spiritual giants who have given their lives to people

To your people

To grow us

And LORD I pray now that I won’t cling on to wanting them back

But I will be a disciple who makes disciples –

that I would be a true disciple, so that their work would not be in vain.

I pray these things

And I ask for LORD just for extra wisdom and sensitivity, and knowledge of how to love doing your work and be able to be real and soft and gentle at the same time. Not try and shut out my own emotions for fear that they’ll overpower me. And make me fruitless/useless in your ministry. You’ve given us all we need for life and godliness and I pray that I would increase in all virtue, knowledge, self-control, steadfastness, godliness, brotherly-affection and love.

//

I was just thinking about John 11:35 when Jesus wept at the death of Lazarus. And I rmb at SOAS CU we talked about how this shows us Jesus deep love for his peoples, anguish at the broken world...But I also just realised that the fact that this is recorded for us means that Jesus didn't hide away and cry. He wasn't ashamed of showing how wrong he felt the world to be...just thinking of this en route back to London from my grandmas village n thinking about how pretending that we don't feel any of the pain in the world just because we have a sure hope in the gospel securing for us a place in God's future glorious kingdom isn't the pattern Jesus set for us :) The brokenness of a sinful world is real and it hurts because God didn't make the world to be this way. It also hurts to see those we love try so hard to save themselves but reject the only true light. But there is work to be done. And so we press on to be faithful to the upward call of Christ to labor in his harvest fields, to bring his elect into his kingdom.